Working Man

Isn't that a Skynard song? No no, that's Simple Man, my bad...and they're from my home town...

I'm sitting here wondering how tough work will be tonight. I work at the local Off the Grill, for those unfamiliar with that franchise (and unless you live in the states of Alabama or Tennessee, you probably aren't), it's like a Steak-Out, we do the big steak meals, burgers (but no fries, please don't ask). Delivery, Take-Out, Dine-In, I don't drive, they are the only sane ones in the store because they don't actually have to stay in the store. No, I'm not that lucky, I cut the steaks first of all, not the burgers or the beef tips (our biggest seller), that's someone else's job. No, I just cut the steaks, like Ribeyes, New York Strips, Filet Mignon (and that's pronounced min-yon for those who can't say that, please, just ask for a filet). Then in order to get enough money to survive I also answer phones and take the orders. Which leads me to the featured portion of todays post...

Top 3 Most Annoying Customer Types

Now I'm doing this as a way to help the public, I realized after I took this job that I used to do some of these things, then I very quickly stopped. I'm not trying to call people idiots...well for some of them I am...but I'm doing this to help you, so you can help me.

1) I'm sorry we don't have fries
I work at a place called Off the Grill, which means that everything there is grilled, no we don't have fried chicken, no we don't have fries. I realize that some people find it offensive to have burgers and not have fries. I'm sorry we just don't have fries. One of the best responses a co-worker ever gave to a guy who asked why we didn't have fries was telling the guy that they tended to fall through the grill.

2) My food cost how much?!
I'm not saying I like the idea of such things, but I gotta follow the bosses rules. You walk into any restaurant where a full meal costs more than $5, and ask to substitute the provided side item for another then you will be charged extra. Applebee's, Chili's, Outback, and yes, Off the Grill all do it. The reason behind this is that certain materials cost more than others, as simple as that. Your meal comes with a potato and a salad and you want grilled mushrooms or oinions instead or the spud or salad? No problem, no charge. Your meal comes with just chips and you want a potato or a salad instead? Sorry man, that's gonna cost you, see you can get a bag of chips for $.59, but spud and salad cost extra. I had a fellow tell me once that substitue means free. I looked at him and said, "No sir, it doesn't." Then explained to him about Applebee's, and Chili's, etc.

3) What What do do you you want want?
It never fails me, every single night that I answer a phone, I could go in just long enough to answer just one phone and it will happen. Being in a college town doesn't help either. Some times it starts out at the very beginning of our conversation. The first thing I will ask for is the phone number because that's how you access names and addresses in our computers. The moment I ask for the phone number I will hear my words echoed out (hopefully) away from the phone mic,

Me:"Can I have your phone number?"
Customer:"Hey dude, what's your phone number?"
(phone number given and name given)
Me:"Alright what is your address?"
Customer: "Dude, what's your address?"

By this point I'm beating my head on the counter top because I know when I ask him how he wants his burger cooked the echoing is going to continue, the potato, the salad dressing, it's all going to be echoed out away from the phone mic, if I'm lucky. If I'm not lucky, and it's happened before. Joe Schmo on the other end will not even bother with moving his mouth away from the mic before shouting across the apartment to the owner asking for the needed information, which leave me deaf in one ear temporarily.

So there we have it, those are the three worst offenders that I've run across. There are others, but mainly of humor and concern only if you live in the Auburn area (Tiger Card anyone? No! we don't take it! I know it says we do on the website, but we don't!).

But please, if you call your local delvery place, be it pizza, wings, or steak, be aware of such things, it will make your order shorter and the order takers night just a little easier.